A conversation with my subconsciousPosted: January 2, 2013
* So last night I dreamed that I was being given a tour of New Improved Walmart by Toronto mayor (ex-mayor? what’s the latest on that?) Rob Ford. Only he didn’t want me to know he was Rob Ford. He had grown some kind of chinbeard as a disguise, but it was a pretty pathetic disguise because he was totally Rob Ford and we all knew it (we? I was with a school group of some kind; I was a schoolgirl). Anyway, he was giving us a tour because Walmart had developed a new Shopping Structure and we needed to know how it worked. And I don’t mean Structure as in “building”, no, this was a new way of organizing your shopping, inspired by Facebook games. Anyone could still come in and shop, but they could only shop for crappy junk in the front room. If you wanted to be able to shop for any of the GOOD stuff, you had to pay for access to those parts of the store. There were multiple shopping levels you could buy into, just for the privilege of shopping. You still had to pay for things you decided to buy. Rob Ford said this was going to revolutionize shopping. For too long, we freeloaders had been allowed to browse the store all we liked – for free! Well, no more. Now, at last, Walmart would start making money!
*I admit, I felt pretty skeptical of his business plan. Who in their right mind would pay to shop at Walmart? A lot of people were doing it, however, and it was true that the stuff you could shop for in the “free” part of the store kind of sucked. And wasn’t really free.
* I can’t decide if this dream is about Facebook, or politics, or some other thing my subconscious has decided to drape in a skin of Facebook and politics.
* Oh, wait, yes I can. Hello, symbols.
* Maybe it was a dream about writing and blogging, about the hidden costs. Here I am a writer, on the NYT best-seller list, in an enviable position, but it doesn’t come without compromise, without paying some part of yourself that you think you won’t miss until one day you do.
* But! Here I am. Things can be recovered. Maybe even all the things. It’s just a matter of figuring out how to do it and doing the work required.
* I make it sound so simple.